us
This blog is composed by sarah and kristin. We love to write, love to have fun, and ... are teenagers. That's about it.

things

It has been years since anyone posted anything here.
i just thought i'd say, we titled this thing beautifully.
beauty did fail me.
but beauty also picked me back up.

i was not beautiful enough to make him stick around,
but i was beautiful enough, in some way shape or form to catch the eye of someone else. someone who looks deeper. and i have no clue how i managed that.

so beauty failed. and then it succeeded.
and i just thought someone should know...

-sar

Beauty. Failed. Me.


so, i dearly love kristin.
and i've been down some too.
how depressingly depressing.

-sar.


funny thing. i got the whole backpack astrologer in a cosmogirl a while ago. but i havent really looked at it yet. not until today. in august, it says:
play fair. funny you would keep tabs on your guy since you're the one who's seeing other people! news flash: he knows whats going on, but he doesn't want to lost you. he's giving you room, so give him your trust.


i thought it was quite ironic. considering....well..you know the story.
just kidding. maybe you dont.
you could guess though.
anyway.

i dont know.
thats all.

-sar.

Beauty. Failed. Me.


i'm in love with this pic.

no. we have not died,
just simply, sort of,
abandoned this blog.
not on purpose however.

i will get some more poetry on here sometime.

maybe i will start my summer reading.
but probably not.

i will after i finish perks.
i promise.
maybe.

but for now, i'm going to
leave with this.

xanga is sucking it up again.
blahhh.
but i love you, kristin dear.
and anyone else who still reads this.


-sar.

Beauty. Failed. Me.


i have this foreboding feeling that this summer will be unescapable bad. so i hope i'm wrong.
speaking of feelings...

feelings (5-26-05) skd

these emotions that run deep inside
are the essence of your identity today
but careful is how you must be
because these feelings are decieving.
look on, as you cry cry cry in pain
with the dagger dug deep into your heart
with no one left to pull it out for you.
and you give yourself up to yourself.
then, within hours of your death of identity
you are laughing because of the magic found
in the eyes of a surreal character you dont know
and you have never been more tickled than now.
the next hour, you are practically fainting
thinking of someone, envisioning their face
wishing you were with them now...
you have never been more in love.
an hour later, you are bored stiff with your life.
nothing has happened to you today and nothing will
you dont even remember the emotional rollercoaster
you just left from, where you spent your day
crying laughing loving forgeting wishing...
and all of these feelings have lied to you once again.



i'm not in a good mood.

-sar.

Beauty.Failed.Me.


even though i'm not sure if thats a good thing or not....
its time for a nice little trip away from the people i know.
but i want it to be secret.
i need a secret little hideaway, big enough for two
but with just me there.

just read.



I won't 4-6-05 skd

I think of the
best thing to
say to you
when i'm angry

But when i finally
get the chance
i think about
how you'd feel.

And i know that i
just can't do it
just can't say it
just can't hurt you.

Even if you do hurt me.



Prayers for Tears 4-6-05 skd

At times like these
and days like now
I'm pretty sure that
everyone in heaven is
looking down at me
praying so hard for me
to keep it up
while God sadly smiles.
I pull my head up
& stick my chin out,
blinking back the tears
they don't even know
they cause me to cry.
And all i can do is
keep walking, saying
"They wont see me weak.
I swear they wont."
And all the prayers from
heaven can't stop me
from breaking down
when I finally get
a safe distance away.




4-13-05 skd

we worked so hard.
we practiced for hours.
we said it all
(out loud & in our heads).
we knew what we were doing.
we'd perfected it to an art.
we knew we were good.
we were so ready, so prepared

and in the end,
it didn't matter
if we succeeded
or if we fell short

as long as we were all there.





not in the best of moods.
crest white-stripping it.
i have another 15 minutes.
heres more stuff.




Comfortable Distance 4-12-05 skd

On the way home
sitting with our legs just an inch apart
I look down and notice how different
yet similar we are.
With the next turn,
I become 3 inches away from you.
I can't decide if it's a tragedy
or simply breathing space.
With the following turn,
there is no space between up,
not even a little bit.
Yet I wonder if I'm
suffocating you.
And with the round of the last corner,
I endup right where I started,
contemplating
if "confortable distance"
is relative not just to people,
but to time itself.



-sar.

Beauty. Failed. Me.


priase the lord! jump for joy!
not that i dont love kristin.
(shes about the only one at this point
who is making an effort to be a friend)
but i was really getting tired of pizza everynight
and staying up late to finish homework.


and i really should go to bed.
because solo and ensemble is tomorrow.
yep thats where i'm going







dont know what i was looking for when i went back home.
i found me alone.
sometimes i need someone to say "you'll be alright"
"whats on your mind?"
but the water's shallow here
and i am full of fear
and empty-handed after two long years.

another sunny day in california.
i'm sure back home they'd love to see it.
but they dont know that what you love is ripped away
before you get a chance to feel it.





-sar

Beauty. Failed. Me.